Earth Defense Force 5 Review
Do you enjoy the zany voice acting, stories, and hordes of enemies of Dynasty Warrior games? How about the bug blasting glory of Starship Troopers? Would you like to know more? Well, then it’s time to check out Earth Defense Force 5! Load up your biggest guns and get ready to cosplay Orkin man as we slide into a world covered in gigantic alien insects and monsters hell-bent on killing everyone and everything with not one ounce of self-preservation in mind.
Dive into the role of an average everyday person hanging out in a massive underground military base until the sudden emergence of very large and angry ants! Then join up with the Earth Defense Force to take on this threat with one of the four unique classes. Lock and load as the Ranger with the ability to wield normal weapons, summon and use vehicles, and give you a great ass view while you sprint just a tiny bit faster.
Take to the skies with the Wing Diver, a class that can fly AND shoots fancy weapons, but both share the same energy pool, so manage it wisely! She also comes with tons of awkward anime girl sounds! The Air Raider serves as a support class that has generally shitty direct combat weapons but can call in massive airstrikes and vehicles as well. He can also put up healing and shield bubbles for the friends I didn’t make in this game.
Finally, the big boy of the group, the Fencer, brings up the rear nice and slow while wielding all of the big guns. He can equip two different sets of beefy armaments that make short work of the bad guys… assuming you’re not reloading the whole time. Use any one of this quartet of destruction to rain down hell upon the already hellish landscape the planet has become. Take to the battlefield in 110 missions of absolute insanity as your screen fills from edge to edge with so many explosions and bugs you’ll think you’re playing a Bethesda game.
Tear apart a wide variety of enemies like ants, asshole ants, two types of creepy spiders UFOs, Bigger UFOs, frog people that for some reason everyone thinks look like humans, Grey aliens in armored suits that people think look nothing at all like humans, flying frogs, and even Tripods for War of the Worlds. Blast each into their respective pieces and watch them keep fighting no matter how many limbs they lose.
There’s nothing more terrifying than a giant alien ass-scooting their way across the street to try and end your life after you blew off their legs! Then when you’re finished, spend half of your mission time running around collecting boxes for armor, health, and one of the literally hundreds of different types of weapons available across the four classes. Now you can take your experience online where you can try and find an open match with the right difficulty, gear level, and mission choice for you to move forward in the completely separate mission progress setup.
Then finally make it into a lobby only to die in the first two minutes and sit on the ground looking pathetic until someone feels sorry enough to come to revive you! Earth Defense Force Five, all of the alien massacre you’ve ever asked for, and then way more than you ever thought you’d need. Also just a bit more on top of that. Is it even possible to use this damn helicopter effectively? I know a lot of the vehicles in this game are clunky, but this is like driving a brick with a brick tied to its ass with bricks for hands.